Friday, May 20, 2005

Global Warming To Blame For Global Cooling

Cambridge, UK--The Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change (IPCC) issued a report indicating a "direct and causal link between global warming, and the haunting specter of global cooling."

Recent research has shown that significant snowfall onto the Antarctic glacier has slowed the rate of rise in ocean levels. Scientists believe that global warming very easily explains these changes.

“Theoretically, we would say that global cooling is a good thing,” said Dr. Mark Daskapital. “But what seems to be a natural, gyroscopic tendency to balance extremes, really only makes us work harder to forge appropriate and timely alarming rhetoric. Climate change is never a good thing.”

Daskapital explains that the melting glaciers “made more water,” and that this significantly increased body of water would “make more water to evaporate,” making “even bigger clouds.”

“This is a complex thing to understand,” said Daskapital. “Only a scientists can detect the nuance of precipitation.

The doctor went on to explain that bigger clouds could provide “more precipitation,” and that most likely explains the sudden spike in cumulonimbus deployment.

“If it weren’t for global warming, we would not be experiencing global cooling,” he said. “And that’s why we need to eliminate the United States and Israel.”

Who Links Here