Sunday, June 19, 2005

Senate Dems Hold Mock Election, Mock Landslide, In Partisan Conclave

Dean Complains of Sen. Byrd's "mock lynching" of Condi

Sen. Byrd's senate colleagues are worried that his
"passionate" opposition to working under articulate black
women could hurt their chances in upcoming fake elections.

Washington--Noting the resounding success of house democrats' "basement impeachment" of the President, Senate democrats held a mock election, in which they actually won an election.

"It felt good to have faux mass appeal again," said Sen. Joe Biden (D-Del.), "There is something entirely therapeutic about having your vitriol manifest itself in a sudden upwelling in the electorate."

Biden admits that the votes taken were comprised entirely of left-of-center friends; the ACLU, the AFLCIO, and the secular Jewish B'nai Brith--just to name a few.

"We did B'nai for diversity," said one source. Conyers wouldn't even have the B'naiers in the House vote, He's got a bit of an edge when it comes to his neighbors having a nicer car, or having his indignation drawn and quartered by androgynous Attorney Generals."

Former Vermont Governor, Howard Dean, who objected to some of the anti-Semitic literature dispersed at the House conclave, also noted that West Virginia senator, Robert Byrd’s effigy lynching of Condoleeza Rice was “an honest mistake.”

“We’ve got to focus on winning fake elections,” he said. “And we’re going start losing our own elections unless Byrd moves his hide-a-gallows out of the senate chamber.”

The election resulted in Senate democrats assuming control over 92 senate seats, with the republicans keeping the seats occupied by John McCain –(AZ), Mike Dewine (OH), Olympia Snowe (ME), Susan Collins (ME), Lincoln Chafee (RI), John Warner (VA), Lindsey Graham (SC ), and Arlen Specter (Penn.)—all which were instrumental in the Senate compromise on filibusters with the exception of Specter.”

“Specter’s our chief switch-hitter,” said one democrat. “Losing him would cause the kind of feelings in our august body that Sen. Byrd would have with Al Jolson for a housekeeper.”

Update: Michelle Malkin just posted a link to this washington post story on Byrd's KKK history, and his attempts to downplay it.

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