Schiavo Autopsy Report: Broken Femurs A Natural Side-Effect Of Brain Damage
Pinellas-Pasco Medical Examiner Jon Thogmartin is concerned
that "non-medically-inclined" people will misinterpret this 1991
bone scan to mean that broken femurs, ribs and ankles are anything
other than the natural components of extended bed time
Pinellas County, Fla.--breathing a collective sigh of relief, Michael Schiavo and his legal team trumpeted the "true and scientific exculpatory nature" of forensic medicine, as Terri Schiavo's long-awaited autopsy report was released today.
"Finally, the vagaries of medical opinion from those who no nothing of medicine can just go away," said Michael Schiavo. "And all your conspiracy theories as to how all those bones were broken are, well, a part of the ash-heap of history."
The report, issued by Pinellas-Pasco Medical Examiner Jon Thogmartin contains “significant redundancies” which generally accompany the forensic report of others whose deaths have resulted from natural causes.
“There is nothing in this report, or in anything I observed, that would indicate even a modicum of foul play,” said Thogmorton. “People lying in persistent vegetative states routinely break the strongest bones in their bodies, through the ergonomically-dangerous act of vigorous laying.”
A 1991 bone scan of Schiavo's body showed a broken femur, as well as ankles and ribs.
Critics of Michael Schiavo and the legal processes leading up to his wife’s death claim that broke femurs are a “significant anomaly worthy of further investigation.”
“And this is why they are not doctors,” said Thogmorton. “Broken Femurs are a direct side effect of compromised neurological conditions. Pregnancy is another, but fortunately Michael . . .I mean Terri did not manifest those symptoms.
The report is expected to put to rest all allegations that Terri was abused by her husband.
posted by Doofus @ 9:22 AM
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