Monday, June 20, 2005

Scientists Create Sperm, Egg From Product Of Sperm, Egg

Breakthroughs could lead to trees from acorns, say scientists

Scientists in Denmark are hedging that they
will soon be able to create a circular, reproductive
model of things like this chick and egg.

Copenhagen, Denmark-- In developments challenging the very sovereignty of God, scientists in the United Kingdom have proved that they can develop in the laboratory into the early forms of cells that eventually become eggs or sperm.

Their secret? Embryonic stem cells--the product of eggs and sperm.

"This is the kind of staggering, creative breakthrough we've been looking for, " said Dr. Lying T. Hue. "Like the veritable magician, or even God himself, we have stumbled on to the key to creating life."

Hue also noted that the theoretical paradigm of using life to create other life is a "new and uncharted" territory.

"Based our preliminary academic models,” said Hue, “we are on track to extract early-stage, self-contained embryonic containers from the common chicken, and could quite possibly turn this around to produce more chickens, thus creating a self-perpetuating wheel for the poultry industry.”

Other analysts see a future in which grandiose-sized oak tress could emerge from something as simple and negligible as the common acorn.

“The axe of reason is laid at the root of Intelligent Design,” said one observer. “We have created man out of theoretical dirt.”

There was no comment as to the origin of the dirt.

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