Friday, June 24, 2005

Democrats Vow To Counter Rove Comments By Increasing Abortions

Washington--Furious democrats, still seething from Karl Rove's accusations of political wimpery during the 9/11 attacks, have vowed to counter what they call "false perceptions" by increasing abortions nationwide.

"Every slight, every backhanded compliment, and every full frontal verbal assault by Karl Rove is a direct attack on a woman's right to choose, " said California Senator Barbara Boxer. "They think they can play the slippery eel with the whole 'coward' bit. I'm not going to sit around here and watch some bespectacled right-winger reach his surreptitious hand into my uterus. I don't care if I have to haul the saline in my own Ford Ranger, I'm going to take the fight straight to the babies."

Boxer said she intended to "fly right in the face of danger," and promote promiscuous sex 'to prime the pumps for a nine-month payoff."

"Karl Rove doesn't know what he's doing when he highlights the yellow," said Boxer. "Because it makes us women see red."

Boxer said that the democrats' stand for abortion "is the real face of courage in this country."

Karl Rove could not be reached for comment, although sources say he was tied up employing an "eminent domain" clause against NOW headquarters as a backroom deal for Starbucks.

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