Thursday, February 17, 2005

David Geffen Now Checking Brake Lines Before Driving Car

New York--Hollywood mogul, David Geffen, has experienced a recent "safety epiphany," manifesting itself with repeated glances under his car before driving.

Geffen(left) May have had awareness of brake-line failure
increased by a concerned Clinton (right), despite
his recently expressed doubts about her political viability

"He's become keenly aware of the hazards of the road," said one of Geffen's confidants. "And we believe he owes it all to Hillary."

Friends believe that Hillary Clinton may have "had a premonition" about Geffen's safety. Geffen recently made a speech denouncing a Clinton presidential run as a "can't-win situation," and that ambition will not translate into votes in four years.

Sen. Clinton's aides noted that despite the fact that Geffen referred to her as a "polarizing figure," she is able to transcend the sometimes-thin face of politics to phone a friend. And this--is where aides believe she may have increased Geffen's awareness about brake-failure percentiles in upper echelon automobiles.

"He really seems grateful for something he has heretofore taken for granted," said an aide. "He seems to look around a lot more these days, and appears to have an almost insatiable desire to remain circumspect at all times. He’s really smelling the roses like never before."

Aides also notes that this new lease on life will make for "many more years of already enjoyable time with Mr. Geffen.

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