Sunday, February 20, 2005

10,000 Of president Bush's Closest Friends Line Up To Play Secretly-Recorded Phone Calls For Media

A huge crowd of Mr. Bush's best friends
stand outside the New York Times, hoping
to sell their own secretly recorded phone

Washington-- Noting the enormous attention given to President Bush's close friend, Doug Wead after playing pieces of secretly recorded conversations with the would-be President, 10,000 of the President's closest friends have all queued up with tapes of their own.

The DNC noted that they are particularly interested. Both Chairman Howard Dean, and Sen Hillary Rodham Clinton, who have become stringent evangelicals in the last two weeks, are curious as to whether an indiscriminate F-word may have escaped Mr. Bush's lips--now an impeachable offense.

"These tapes are very interesting," said Sen Clinton. "Mr. Wead only played a few snippets for the Times, but this thing he said about 'not wanting to kick the gays because I'm also a sinner,' could have severe, homophobic underpinnings. We need to hear more."

While the Wead tapes are relatively benign, the fact that Mr. Bush's friend has held back the balance of the tapes allows press organizations to employ their favorite journalistic tool, the "this raises more questions than answers" outcue in their stories.

ABC News White House Correspondent, Terry Moran, is particularly deft at this technique. "The great thing is, I can return to my raised eyebrow technique that spells "suspicion" for this president" he said.

The affable Mr. Bush, who values his close personal friendships, is said to be "amused" by the huge, public outpouring of friendship for him at The New York Times. One aide is "astonished."

"It is clear that the President's friends really value those private things between them," he said. "And they can display this no better by giving those private things to the media."

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