Iran Denies Harboring IraniansIran--Staring the "imperialist devil" in the face, Iran denounced implications by the United States that it is harboring Iranians within its borders.
"This is just an outrage!" said a UN representative to the country. "You little feeble Americans think that your 1950's-era tactics will works on us? You are wrong, oh great Satans from the West!"
Iran is believed by the United States
to be harboring and surreptitiously
moving Iranians within its borders. These
allegations have outraged Iran
UN General Secretary, Kofi Annan, noted that the diplomatic dialogue implicating Iran in the harboring and quartering of Iranians "wasn't helpful," and that "sincere and unambiguous dialogue with our 'good cowboy' neighbors in Iran" is what will prevent further diplomatic breakdowns. He also said that Israel should face "proximity sanctions" for such a remark.
Currently, no country is willing to come forward and actually say where the Iranians may be kept. US sources say that high-resolution satellite imagery indicates a "preponderance of Persian" within the Iranian borders.
Iran denies these allegations outright.