Wednesday, February 08, 2006

White House Raises Concerns About Arab Advances In Gasoline, Matches

Flint and steel technology only "years away" from reality, say sources

The White House says it is "deeply concerned" about the ability
of Islamic militants to light up effigies "seemingly at will."

Washington--As riots continue to flummox the Islamic world, Washington is quitely registering concerns that Arab Muslims areound the world are becoming "highly adept" at the seemingly effortless employment of sulphur-headed matches, along with the accelerant--gasoline.

"We are talking about one of the most chameleon-like enemies," said one official. "They can adapt on a dime, if they have to. If it's only taken them a few thousand years to crack the arsonist's code, what will they be capable of in a frew more years."

Washinton insiders say that the seamless ability to set fire to things makes this enemy "the sacriest one to date."

"The sheer will power and cognitive brilliance still confounds our bean-counters over here," saod one source. "We're hoping we can at least slow down their advances in flint and steel technology."

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