Today's Headline Is . . .Oh, I don't know. How about:
Democrats Place Hope In Beatty's Sqeaky-Clean Sexual Past
(insert body of story here, with fake quotes that support the presumably funny headline)
Get no traffic.
I'm just going to park this thing for a while, folks, while I try to figure out how to match the ascerbic wit of other satire sites, some of which cannot even maintain a single paragraph of quasi-journalistic cadence through even one paragraph. But they've got me hands down in the traffic department.
And no, I'm not going to name them, because I'm not going to start a fight.
Actually the time has come to reconfigure. I will either permenently moor this blog, and start another one with an entirely different premise (possibly an intelligent blog, maybe?) I may drop the satire, and make this my own analytical/humorous aside, or just start writing straight material.
This satire stuff aint cutting it, outside the 200 blessed that show up here. Scrappleface owns the right edge, The Onion owns the left. Audience loyalty is a galvanized issue that I underestimated. Apparently, Scxrappleface readers feel like they're committing literary adultery by even coming here. Who am I to try to break up that marriage?
Either way, the time has come to change this riff. I'm tired of flailing in a genre that, while good, and funny, and whatever it supposedly is--isn't working.
But I am going to be around. Just not wasting my time on stupid, edgy headlines that strike viscerally at the midriff of a dead horse of potential.
I've actually started another blog, but I've yet to breathe life into its nostrils. Then again, I've yet to do it here.
Oh, and no comments. I will be diabling them anyway, because I don't want to hear it. Really.