Broussard To Retract Drowning Timeline On Wednesday,Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, and Monday
"I am totally emabarassed, shamed, chagrinned, angry, and disappointed," he says
Broussard, in his Sept. 4th appearance on Meet The Press, is seen wailing, caterwauling, emoting, knashing his teeth and giving the grand catharsis to Tim Russert.
New Orleans--Jefferson County parish president, Aaron Broussard announced today that he will "publicly retract" his timeline with regard to the drowning a a friend's mother. Broussard is expected to retract the timeline sometime during the Wednesday news cycle, and possibly attempt to continue attempting to retract it every day through the following Monday.
Broussard, who's Sept. 4th appearance on NBC's Meet the Press, stunned the world with his emotional account of the incident, along with the time frame called into question by Wuzzadem, a prominent humor and satire blog, who's investigative asides spurred the entire maelstrom by merely comparing actual hurricane development timelines with Broussard's claim from the show:
BROUSSARD: ... The guy who runs this building I'm in, emergency management, he’s responsible for everything. His mother was trapped in St. Bernard nursing home and every day she called him and said, "Are you coming, son? Is somebody coming?" And he said, "Yeah, Mama, somebody's coming to get you. Somebody's coming to get you on Tuesday. Somebody's coming to get you on Wednesday. Somebody's coming to get you on Thursday. Somebody's coming to get you on Friday." And she drowned Friday night. She drowned Friday night.
While sources say the woman in question did perish in the flooding—and in the nursing home in which the two owners now face indictment for the death of scores more—that the timeline actually lays between late Saturday and early Monday.
Broussard noted he was “emotional,” and that he has been subject to dramatic point of departure “ever since I was seven, eight, nine ten, eleven and twelve.” Many that know Broussard vouch for his sincerity, but note that his recollections of hurricane Katrina “could also include a storm continuum from September, October, November December, January and February.”
“He’s a good man, woman, vegetable, mineral and carbon-based life form, “ said one friend. “He’d never intentionally mislead, hoodwink, step-on, pad, embroider, or play the slippery eel with the facts.”
Broussard is expected to take to the airwaves starting Wednesday to retract, reconsider, evaluate, correct and validate his timeline on NBC, CBS, FOX, CNN, The Discovery Channel, The Trinity Broadcasting Network and Animal Planet, to set the record straight, settle the score, even the playing field, re-magnetize the compass, and take the wheel out of the sand.
posted by Doofus @ 7:30 AM
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