Friday, August 12, 2005

Country Joe & The Fish To Set Up Stage Outside Bush Ranch

Vow to teach acronymically chanted F-word to Cindy Sheehan, supporters

Crawford, Tx.--Noting their musical omnipotence in single-handedly ending the Vietnam war, 60's musical icons Country Joe & The Fish said they are "heading to Crawford Texas," to aid in the exponentially-growing protest against the Iraq war.

Sheehan lost her son to battle in April of 2004.

"This started out as a one-woman riot," said lead singer "Country Joe" McDonald. Now it's grown to a mind-numbing fourteen. I can feel the warm gales of Woodstock blowing through this situation like nothing I've ever felt."

McDonald says that is why he "feels compelled" to head to Crawford, Texas and teach people how to spell the f-word.

"Easily the finest moment in our band's history," he said. "Having tens of thousands of people yelling "f--k" at the same time--this is the kind of deep, metaphysical connection that told the North Vietnamese, "we feel your pain , and we can still spell bad words through the unwieldy veil of drugs and alcohol."

McDonald also said he hopes that Sheehan will "not quench the anti-war spirit" by eschewing the greatest tool at the disposal of peace-loving people: rampant, wanton unprotetced sex with the other thirteen protesters.

"There's something about the mindless proliferation of Gonorrhea and out-of-wedlock pregnancies that tell the government, 'it's time for mature people to take control.'"

Many in media are already hailing the move by the band as "CrawfordStock."

"The momentum is bulding," said one journalist. "There could be twenty protesters here by next week."

Who Links Here