Thursday, June 01, 2006

Wacky Democrat Endorses Bush Assassination In Zany, Extemporaneous Gaffe

"I am such a ding dong," says fun-loving State Controller

State Controller Hevesi, seen here testing protoype Laura Bush rape jokes, is known as a "wacky, zany wit" amongst democrats. Some say advocating a presidential assassination is "going too far," while others see it as the repartee of a man comfortable in his own skin.

New York-When New York State Controller Alan Hevesi said that State senator Charles Schmumer was the man to "put a bullet between the president's eyes," he has no idea the sheer comic value his remarks would contain.

"Oh man, Letterman is going to have my lunch tonight," said Hevesi, to collective laughs from the gathered press on the steps at Queens College. "My mother always said I was a wide-cracking nut."

Key democrats said the gaffe was the kind of "extemporaneous, Freudian politics sorely missing from the political landscape."

"He is just plain off the hook zany," said one democratic insider. " "His fun-loving antics are always lightening our collective days. Man is he a zany fun-fest!"

Meanwhile, key Republicans, seemingly bent on taking any perceived gaffe on the part of democrats as ingrained malevolencies, were not laughing.

"This is a serious matter," said one key Republican lawmaker. "This is not going away."

Yet, most democratic insiders say the GOP protests far too much, and would very much like to "squeeze the rhetorical blood of bitterness from the turnip of good-natured ribbing."

"They have absolutely no sense of humor over there," said Nancy Pelosi. "Their main horse has a broken leg. It ought to be dealt with accordingly."

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