Thursday, January 13, 2005

Allah Judged Incompetent To Help in Tsunami Crisis

Despite a federal court's ruling striking Allah's involvement in saving his people from the horrific effects of the Indonesian Tsunami, a Virginia-based christian group will continue backing off their attempt to help water-logged Muslim kids because the muslims see yet another conspiracy by the Great Satan.

It was originally thought that the group, WorldHelp, had airlifted as many as 300 children from the Muslim province of Aceh, and spirited them away to Jakarta, where such nefarious brainwashing techniques like food, shelter, and thoughts of non-suicide retributions are thought to be employed as dastardly conversion tactics.

Fortunately, the Muslim fears were allayed when it was discovered that the children were still languishing in the province; starving, orphaned and in danger of the effects of cholera. WorldHelp has since backed off from their serruptitous plan to comfort the orphans, after having their clandestine operation brought to light by the Washington Post.

WorldHelp had heard about the ruling from the 11th Circuit, but declined to fill the voids created by Allah's ouster, stating that "the gig is up for us."

Representatives of the Acehnese Muslims stated that WorldHelp's attempt to corral these children also misrepresents the ability of their own leaders to provide the needed items, which they say is completely baseless.

"We have a bright little vest, with lots of pretty wires, for each of them," one was quoted.

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