Tuesday, March 22, 2005

Insider Host O'Brien Admits Self To Rehab For Name Dropping

Entered Larry King Clinic on Monday

Sources close to O'Brien (left) say that despite his
name dropping and constant cloying at celebrities,
that Larry King (right) still knows more important

Los Angeles--Host of television's The Insider, Pat O'Brien, has admitted himself into the Larry King Clinic for Chronic Proximity Hounds, as he "comes to terms with" his addiction to name-dropping.

In a written statement, O’Brien lamented his temporary absence from the show:

“I realized from the moment I received five-hundred emails when my address was hacked from Paris Hilton’s cell phone, that I may have a problem. I called Donald Trump and asked him what I should do. He put me in touch with Courtney Cox and Jim Carrey who told me about how Larry King struggles with the same thing. I called Larry, and he told me he was Jewish, and how Steven Spielberg, Barbara Streisand, David Blaine, Herb Cohen, Jackie Mason, and a whole bunch of other friends of his were Jewish. He then said I should go to his clinic, where he would see me later, after his interview with J-Lo, and Clay Aiken. It was then I decided to suspend my activities from The Insider, and get help. I’m also in here for alcoholism. Liza Minelli's in here, too.”

Colleagues of O’Brien’s wish him the best, and note that if Larry King can’t help him, nobody can.

“Larry King’s Epitaph will tell you not only who he is, but who he’s buried next to,” said one source. “We don’t want that same thing for Pat. God bless him, and we hope he gets over the alcohol thing, too.”

Who Links Here