Monday, November 20, 2006

Michael Richards To Redeem Racist Tirade By Bashing Bush

Says he called man a "nigger" because of Republican culture of corruption

Richards: Says Bush Administration policies made him play the "fork
sodomization" card . Regrets not making comments "Condoleeza palatable"
to liberal audience.

New York--When Seinfeld actor, Michael Richards, called a heckler a "nigger," he didn't realize just how deeply he had been affected by the last twelve years of Republican govermental hegemony.

"It just gets under your skin," said Richards. "One minute I'm a firm democrat with diametric ideological differences with the right wing, then next minute I'm lambasting a paying customer as a porch monkey. I'm hoping that the inauguration of the 105th Congress can help us all get past this."

Richards also said that his remarks should be seen as the "botched joke" that it was, and not the emanations of any serious animous towards black people.

"I don't think I'm going to have an easy time getting those people to understand my point," he said. "I'm going to have to let my pro-choice postions navigate the viability of my career, as well."

Cultural observers say the viability of Richards' career are also contingent on the actor's feelings about the Mel Gibson film, The Passion of The Christ. Critics of the actor are currently scouring the press backlogs and journalistic nexus files to see if Richards ever held any postive opinions of the crucifixion of Jesus.

"We're hoping we can find at least some kind of contempt for the Savior" said one unnamed insider. "Because in Hollywood, contempt for Jesus covers a multitude of sins."

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